Pregnant and need some advice...?

This is complicated and will be fairly long, so if your not up for reading then don't bother answering....No longer with ex, he's a sbag, broke up in December, haven't talked to him until recently, he called me just a few days ago and must have ESP because I just found out he has gotten me pregnant last week by him, I'm 6 months, haven't been showing, no morning sickness, have been irregular since the beginning, and have bloating and constipation issues that caused me to right off any umptions of pregnancy, plus I've been so busy I haven't had much time to think about it (i had a monthly until March btw) and plus he was suppose to tell me if he believed he had made a mistake or the condom had broken, which he definitely FAILED to do...needless to say since I've told you the big stuff, I am in a state of shock, because I am pro-choice and decided if I were to make a mistake that I would get an abortion as long as I wasn't more than 6 weeks...6 months however is out of the question...whether legal or not for me....now however I am faced with the two decisions I thought I wouldn't have to choose if I were to get pregnant and that is adoption or to keep the baby, since the only options I wanted to consider was either to have the baby and keep it, or not have the baby at all...my family wants me to do adoption, saying it's best for the child, and to only think of the child in this matter. However due to a similar situation being present with one of my bestfriends in highschool where her decision was "influenced" by her family and found a loving family for her little girl. However, afterwards she began to get so depressed that all she could think about was her daughter, and not to go into to much detail I will just say that she has not been right since, for lack of a better word. It seems wrong to me, even though this is a very very unplanned pregnancy, always knowing there is a child out there that belongs to me being raised by someone else makes me sick. Unfortunately, my family is only thinking about the child at this point and not of me, but their probably thinking of themselves more than anything since I am dependent on them as a college student. I don't have a very good relationship with anyone in my family due to many issues throughout my life, and if I am "coerced" into this decision, I believe the anger and sadness of losing something I love already so much for the benefit of others in my family and for myself would probably kill me, literally. I have been for most of my life very alone and emotionally detached from anyone around me, and feel if I have this child and do keep it that it willl fill a whole that has been left inside me for a long time. I've never felt truly loved even though my family probably does love me, I don't feel it from them, but will definitely feel it from something that will love me for me, because I'm her mother, and she will need no other reason to love me. My family has caused me alot of grief and sadness since I was little, and it was a traumatic experience seeing everyone in your family fighting each other while growing up, and no one to turn to. I distrust them, and don't want this decision to be made for me, however my financial position as this time, will offer me no choice...and that is why I need advice